In the end, we are all only bidding our time, are we not? We follow a system of studies and careers, inventing words like 'economy' and 'politics' when, if you strip off the superficialities, we can do just fine without them. We label things so that they make sense, because we fail to see that nonsense is sense. We create neurotic technology and make our lives 'easier' but unless we stop and think, we'd never realise that we're only making it easier to pass time until the final day when we don't have to pass time anymore.
In the end, life is but a number of picked-up scenes, a collection of memories, a finished puzzle that looks like it's done by a child. It is nothing more than an anthology of the virtues we create for ourselves and we base our success upon how well we abide by rules of our own concoction. Life is but a summary of first seeing the colours of the world, and the moment when you last do so - the intermediate phases are merely silly, meaningless, ridiculous ideas that we fill our time with, all of which will decay when we do.
Yippa-doo-dee-doo.
Tuesday, 23 June 2009
Saturday, 20 June 2009
Internet at Coffee Bean
I thought the Coffee Bean guy was really nice, helping me with a username and all. And I see Sarah here! Nice, though odd, coz we're supposed to meet up later, not now, and me lah... clever clever, pergi Coffee Bean.
Now that I'm back in Malaysia for a whole week, it does feel quite nice to be home. Work is good too, because the people there are very happy to show me the ropes, and I get to meet people who are not just my age. So... back in Malaysia - hello high ceilings and tall green trees (but terrible haze). Goodbye cottage-like houses and cute rose shrubs (but dirty room). Guess there's good and bad everywhere. =P
You know what? I had a whole list of things I wanted to post about, but now that I'm actually online, there's nothing much that I remember. Brilliant, isn't it?
Ah well.
Tabby - I take it you like Aus better. =P
TJ - Yes, it is. But it's not polished or edited yet, so... LoL.
Denise - I actually missed your nonsense. Hope you're having fun being Deputy Head. =)
Now that I'm back in Malaysia for a whole week, it does feel quite nice to be home. Work is good too, because the people there are very happy to show me the ropes, and I get to meet people who are not just my age. So... back in Malaysia - hello high ceilings and tall green trees (but terrible haze). Goodbye cottage-like houses and cute rose shrubs (but dirty room). Guess there's good and bad everywhere. =P
You know what? I had a whole list of things I wanted to post about, but now that I'm actually online, there's nothing much that I remember. Brilliant, isn't it?
Ah well.
Tabby - I take it you like Aus better. =P
TJ - Yes, it is. But it's not polished or edited yet, so... LoL.
Denise - I actually missed your nonsense. Hope you're having fun being Deputy Head. =)
Sunday, 14 June 2009
Back Home
Tabby - Til next time. Maybe we'll be able to meet up somehow, LoL.
Gitz - Yes, sweetie. Sort me out. Haha. I need sorting out.
Well, after slightly more than 24 hours of pure travelling (including waiting for boarding, transit, on the bus, on the plane), I'm finally home. I'm at work now, and it's the only time I can get online (lunchbreak now) because the internet at home isn't working. I know what you're thinking - What? No internet?
NO LIFE LAH!
You ain't far off.
I think I need just a couple more days to get used to this. It feels kind of odd/strange/unreal. I feel as if I'm still in air, having not really touched ground, suspended between two lives.
I will miss Brighton - I'm already beginning to. I will miss the incredible freedom and utter independence. It's like, when you're on your own, you account for no one else. You live life based only on the network that you create for yourself - friends, teachers, people you meet. It's cool if you walk over to Waterstone's and read books until your eyes pop, or if you shop until you literally drop, or if you sit in Sput-In alternating between stuffing your face in a jacket potato and peoplewatching - you don't have to go into lengthy explanations about why you'd rather not go back home yet, or why you'd like two more minutes to walk around (except, perhaps, 'Eh, file a missing person's report ah if I'm not back tomorrow'). There are drawbacks, of course. There are times when you'd feel anti-social, times when you feel lonely, times when all you want to do is curl into yourself.
All my life, I've lived a sheltered life. Too much of one, to be honest, but for which I'm eternally grateful to my family. And so when I leaped and tore myself away from my roots, I learnt to just bloody stand on my own two feet. I learnt to wash my eyes and see life from a different angle, yet I've also learnt to appreciate what I've known before and to know that there are certain habits or little ways of mine that I will have to live with, because I cannot escape.
Every time I start something new, I convince myself that there is another perspective to life that I'm about to discover, another secret for me to catch, another mystery to unlock so that I don't live life by a humdrum pulse. But there aren't all that many perspectives to take anyway. I feel as if I've tried nearly all, and I still can't nail it.
If you've got the Big Secret, let me know. Or give me some sort of clue so that I wind my way through and find it - but still, give me a clue. A hint. Anything, really. When you reach a point, you stop being fussy.
Random note to self: Part I, fin. Part II, fin. Part III, fin. Hence, Part IV and Part V, left. And definitely the longest two. Especially if I want to add in one part with MC's POV.
Gitz - Yes, sweetie. Sort me out. Haha. I need sorting out.
Well, after slightly more than 24 hours of pure travelling (including waiting for boarding, transit, on the bus, on the plane), I'm finally home. I'm at work now, and it's the only time I can get online (lunchbreak now) because the internet at home isn't working. I know what you're thinking - What? No internet?
NO LIFE LAH!
You ain't far off.
I think I need just a couple more days to get used to this. It feels kind of odd/strange/unreal. I feel as if I'm still in air, having not really touched ground, suspended between two lives.
I will miss Brighton - I'm already beginning to. I will miss the incredible freedom and utter independence. It's like, when you're on your own, you account for no one else. You live life based only on the network that you create for yourself - friends, teachers, people you meet. It's cool if you walk over to Waterstone's and read books until your eyes pop, or if you shop until you literally drop, or if you sit in Sput-In alternating between stuffing your face in a jacket potato and peoplewatching - you don't have to go into lengthy explanations about why you'd rather not go back home yet, or why you'd like two more minutes to walk around (except, perhaps, 'Eh, file a missing person's report ah if I'm not back tomorrow'). There are drawbacks, of course. There are times when you'd feel anti-social, times when you feel lonely, times when all you want to do is curl into yourself.
All my life, I've lived a sheltered life. Too much of one, to be honest, but for which I'm eternally grateful to my family. And so when I leaped and tore myself away from my roots, I learnt to just bloody stand on my own two feet. I learnt to wash my eyes and see life from a different angle, yet I've also learnt to appreciate what I've known before and to know that there are certain habits or little ways of mine that I will have to live with, because I cannot escape.
Every time I start something new, I convince myself that there is another perspective to life that I'm about to discover, another secret for me to catch, another mystery to unlock so that I don't live life by a humdrum pulse. But there aren't all that many perspectives to take anyway. I feel as if I've tried nearly all, and I still can't nail it.
If you've got the Big Secret, let me know. Or give me some sort of clue so that I wind my way through and find it - but still, give me a clue. A hint. Anything, really. When you reach a point, you stop being fussy.
Random note to self: Part I, fin. Part II, fin. Part III, fin. Hence, Part IV and Part V, left. And definitely the longest two. Especially if I want to add in one part with MC's POV.
Tuesday, 2 June 2009
Things I need to do in M'sia
Things to do:
1. Work - well, duh... LoL
2. Scan all my family's old pictures so that I have a digital copy of them.
3. Get a driving license.
4. Go shopping with Jo (I'll drag her along anyway).
5. Spend time with - of course - my lovely friends! And family, too.
6. Plan a farewell for Cousins Pei Hwa and Pei Wen?
7. Take Jo to her piano exam thing.
8. Shop for cheap clothes, 'cause everything here is pricey.
9. Draft out the coursework for Literature (which includes A LOT of reading).
10. Write! Finish Part III at least.
11. Play the guitar + piano.
12. Buy 'The Pact' paperback version.
Note to self:
Stop living in the past; stop planning the future - please just capture the bloody present.
1. Work - well, duh... LoL
2. Scan all my family's old pictures so that I have a digital copy of them.
3. Get a driving license.
4. Go shopping with Jo (I'll drag her along anyway).
5. Spend time with - of course - my lovely friends! And family, too.
6. Plan a farewell for Cousins Pei Hwa and Pei Wen?
7. Take Jo to her piano exam thing.
8. Shop for cheap clothes, 'cause everything here is pricey.
9. Draft out the coursework for Literature (which includes A LOT of reading).
10. Write! Finish Part III at least.
11. Play the guitar + piano.
12. Buy 'The Pact' paperback version.
Note to self:
Stop living in the past; stop planning the future - please just capture the bloody present.
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